Sunday, July 19, 2009

So Frustrating

Part Of Being Sane Is Being A Little Bit CrazyImage by stage88 via Flickr

Sometimes I feel that I am so overhelmed by the reality that surrounds me that I am going to explode. ..

The television blares, Maya playes games on the computer and I can hear all kind of noises, I am going to the post office and it is full of people that speak incessantly , Maya comes to bother me - it usually happens when I try to do something on my own, by myself, alone. She talks and talks and talks until she captures my attention, she wants to play a game with me and not by herself near me...the dogs whines because he needs to pee, my husband calls and asks me, candidly, "How are the girls?" and I just want to scream :Quiet!!!!!!!!!!

I need some quiet, I need some silence to hear myself, to hear my thoughts. I had enough of this craziness. It is not enough that the outside world is upside down, my own world is going to collapse???Whenever I need somebody to call, to talk to me, nobody does it, I am left alone; whenever I want some quiet to surround me, everybody just goes nuts and starts making noise!

What a stupid charade...I am never satisfied, ain't I?

Well, I turned off the TV, the dog had his pee, I took over the computer where Maya was playing, I gave her some building blocks and now she builds me a castle and even if I don't have my perfect stilness, it is manageable and I can relax and unstiffen my shoulders.

So, start complainig and start doing something for yourself!

OK. I'll go to pluck my eyebrows, they look like some wild, hairy catterpillars. And then, back to the vacuum cleaner, hang out the clothes, wash the floor, feed Maya...Ouch!!!

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Cinder Rail'lee said...

I love my quiet time.. I rarely get it!

Alone in Holy Land said...

You tell me about it...

Elizabeth Mahlou said...

I never knew what quiet time was until I became an empty nester. The oldest of eight children, mother of seven, married while I was still in college, I never had time for myself. But somehow, I did not feel that great a need for it. (Perhaps I am just weird -- or perhaps you cannot miss what you never had. My paraplegic daughter, when asked if she misses not being able to walk, asks if the questioner misses being able to fly, i.e. she does not know what walking is and so cannot miss it, and I never knew what quiet time was and so could not miss it.)

The thing is that the kids grow up so fast, and all of a sudden there is a lot of quiet time -- and, I don't know about other folks, but I miss the NOISE!

I hope you will enjoy your daughter while you have her as a small one; she looks so cute. We really can find minutes for quiet if that is important, but we never get back missed time with our children. And in a little bit, she will want to play with her peers, not with you unless she has built a tradition of having your time and attention. It's worth the loss of quiet time, in my opinion, for what that is worth.